- Enjoy a smooth cigarette tonight. No hangover tomorrow — just imminent death!
- For a smooth, menthol taste, choose Newport. Great for the heart!
- Even Lebron James smokes Camels!
- I tell my 9-year-old son, “Reach for a Lucky Strike!”
- Cancer, Schmancer! Light up an Old Gold!
- Parliament Lights keep my smile pearly white!
- People who matter smoke Marlboro!
- Studies show it’s not as dangerous as second hand smoke!
- Even the Pope smokes Parliaments!
- Cigarettes don’t kill people, second hand smoke kills people!
- Makes my hair smell like a motel carpet!
- Even my pulmonologist is a Marlboro man!
- I love a nice cigarette break in sub-zero winter temperatures!
- Lungs? Who needs ‘em!
- What’s your definition of “toxic”?
- Even Barack Obama smokes Old Golds!
- Define “deadly”.
- Totally not addictive at all, like not even a little bit.
- Everything you’ve heard about us is a lie.
- The only side effect is increased coolness!
- Phlegmy coughs are all the rage!
This post was originally published on my Medium.